Saturday, April 13, 2013

A to Z Challenge: Lips

I love my lips. I believe there was a Veggie Tales song written with the same title, and I suppose this is because Larry the cucumber knows how vital lips are to your everyday life. (we'll pretend he actually has lips for the sake of this conversation). Your lips help you eat, talk, convey emotions ... yet we often neglect them in our makeup routines in favor of foundations and eyeshadows.

I could wax poetic about the products most people already know: Revlon Lip Butters are an awesome product, as are Maybelline Baby Lips and just about any other moisturizing lip balm. So today I'd like to switch it up a bit by talking about my favorite products that don't even have any tint and aren't used to show off your pretty smile, but rather to care for and protect your lips when they appear naked and unadorned.

My first love was brought to my attention by my good online friend Asia (say 'I see ya!' out loud with a very thick southern accent, sounding a little dopey, very fast. that is how you pronounce "Asia"), who vlogs on YouTube over yonder. She mentioned it in a Target haul video a while back and I didn't think much of it until it began to get sunny and muggy down here in Georgia: a true sign of the times until at least September. My constantly dry lips then began to realize that maybe the product she was mentioning might be a good idea after all. Enter my newfound love: ELF Lip Exfoliator.

Image thanks to
Asia describes this product as smelling just like a big, hot bowl of brown sugar cinnamon oatmeal, and she could not be closer to the truth. The smell of this stuff conjures up sitting at the kitchen table with my mother in the winter before school, eating a bowl of oatmeal with a small pool of butter in the middle, holding a book open with one hand and a spoon in the other. It tastes like pure sugar on your lips, too, which is fitting because this is a sugar scrub in a lipstick tube.

Simply apply liberally to your lips and rub them together to exfoliate your lips with the granulated sugar crystals, and then let it fade away or - if you're me - lick it off because it just tastes so good you can't stop yourself. The best part about this and all other ELF products is that at $3 (and $3 is one of their more expensive price points), this is a wonderful and affordable way to give your lips the TLC they deserve that they might not otherwise be getting. I put some on each morning on my way to work and I have licked it all off it's faded away by the time I get to my desk, at which point I can apply some tinted lip stuff after I eat my morning yogurt.

The other product I come touting to you today is a lip balm, but not just any lip balm with a generic spearmint or cherry flavoring: this one is truly something else, and you know that before you even unwrap the label.

Unicorn Farts lip balm - yes, really - is made by one of the most creative Etsy sellers I know, Long Winter Farm. It applies so butter-smooth you barely know you're wearing any lip balm, and it smells like a marshmallow covered in peppermint and gently rolled in cocoa powder. If that sounds too much for you, though, don't worry: it only smells good and has no actual taste.

The other thing I love is the elongated tube - it's almost flat and an oval shape, which is perfect for your lip. When I was younger I was enamored by my mother's ability to leave a perfect lip-shaped dent in each tube of lipstick she owned, and it was something I've never managed to emulate until now. Unicorn Farts just applies like a dream, moisturizes your lips and gives them a subtle sheen without being glossy. It retails for $4 on Etsy, but is well worth it.

I use other lip products, as I've mentioned, and am a huge lip balm junkie. However, nothing in my vast lip care experience has come close to touching these two jewels, which I come here to proffer today. Go on, pucker up!


  1. Oh. My. What a fun post! I'm cracking up. It has everything - from Larry the Cucumber to lips to sensible advice on how to get them uncracked. Love it! I'm so glad you came over to visit me!
    Thanks so much for signing up for my book release day, too. :)

    Laura Eno – A Shift in Dimensions